its pretty sad when....

mtm2 and other sensible chat
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legwon
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Post by legwon »

well it came down to a breaking point tonight. she was supposed to be babysitting for her mother, i got injured at work and came home early. we were talkin about a few things then she started yelling, i started yelling, then she tried to pin the whole break-up on me.

i dont think so. i kicked her ass out, along with most of her stuff that was still here.
ive had nothing but 3 weeks of BS. i dont need it, my daughter doesnt need it, and my roommate- her mother, dont need it.
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Eat Dirt
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Post by Eat Dirt »

Hey man, I only may be 14...But just hang in there, she want to just get up and leave like that...She wasent the right woman for you, you know what i am saying?
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legwon
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Post by legwon »

not quite on topic but i just got dumped with more crap last night.
my real father, whom i havnt seen or talked to in almost 10 yrs, is in the hospital just down the road on life support. went down there last night with my mom and the Ex. i didnt quite know what to do , what to say or anything.
he put me, my mother, and my brother through living hell. appearently they've been looking for next-of-kin for a couple of days now. idk if they want me to sign papers or what. noone will give info on the situation. i have to wait for a call today from the icu worker. more than likely 101 questions for me too.

this last month has been nothing but bs after bs. idk what im gonna do. idk if i can handle all this at once. i know im stong willed but this is getting rediculous.

whats next? or should i even ask.........
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Wint
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Post by Wint »

> "idk if i can handle all this at once"

You can handle it. You've got a loving daughter, family, and friends, I would think that's a great support group and could be a great distraction from life's heavier moments. Moments, indeed, these are just moments, you're old enough to realize time will pass and things will change, so just hang in there buddy. I can see the road is rough, and I'm sorry it's that way.

A fictional character in a novel I once read said: "the surest amelioration of one's own misery is to be obtained by helping another person". Seems like pretty good advice: to get out of your own funk try focusing on doing something nice for someone else. Keeping busy, keeping positive and keeping the big picture in perspective will carry you through. Focus on the things you can change, don't let others destroy your peace, and press onward.

> "went down there last night"

I believe you fulfilled the fifth commandment in doing that (honor your father and mother), so... well done man.

Best wishes for you and yours.
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legwon
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Post by legwon »

well its been 9 or 10 weeks now and im still reeling. im finding out more stuff everyday.
the new guy and i have talked a few times, the EX and i have talked a few times.
this is whats going down.

the monday b4 she left, she slept with him(she denies it, he admits it).
she says "he was just there".
he says she forced him into the relationship. b4 breaking up with me.
she says he kind of pressured her into sex.
she EXPECTS me to be her friend.
he wants her to take responsibility for what she did.(i agree)
she expects him to support her after he gets a job.
she cant make up her mind of what shes doing.
she cant do anything without screwing up her life anymore than it is already.
she is not looking for a place.
she is not looking for a job.
she burnt out 4 different options for places to stay so far. and about to burn out another.

fight, argue, fight, argue, fight, argue, fight, argue, fight, argue, fight, argue, etc, etc.

as of tuesday, the ex and i were talking about getting together agian.
she said she would think about it.
shes seen the other guy for a total of MAYBE 1 hour in 3 weeks.
wednesday, we talked again. she said IF we do get together again, she wants to be married within the year. i said, no freekin way!!
i asked her, how am i supposed to justify doing that after all of this BS?
she said , i dont know.

then thursday, i had to reformmat my pc, went to reinstall some of my games and my game case is gone!!! case disks everything.

havnt talked to her yet. she was over again yesterday when i was at work to pick up her stuff. pick and chose through the stuff.

both of us are pretty messed up over this situation. neither of us really know what we want.
i want her to come back, but if this crap happens again. im gonna snap and loose it.
she wants to come back but she wants a better family life.
i busted my butt for 5 yrs for her and our daughter.

the other day i was talking to her mother. i made a comment about her maybe being schitz, she said "i wouldnt doubt it, it runs in our family."
now this is a big freekin shocker.
when i was talking to the new guy last weekend, he noticed a few things that really bothered him. like when something is said that ann doesnt like, she just snaps and is angry for hours on end. dosnt matter how big or little the comment or action was. snap mood swings.
he has experienced the "i can and u cant" trip. so its not just me :)
she freaked out on her mother yesterday b/c she wouldnt let ann in the house, she was going out grocery shopping. she was everyting but a human. then she just left all the stuff that she didnt want here. :x

she supposed to meet me today for a halloween thing down at the rec center. but idk if i even want to see her now. i may just explode from the last couple of days.

the new guy isnt all that bad i really dont blame him for anything. yes he knew about me, but ann told him that our relationship was almost done anyways. i had NO intentions of leaving.
the week b4 she left, her , her mother, and a friend of theirs were talking about getting her problem fixed so that she could have kids. she was saying how much she loved me, that she wanted to get married and have my kid(s), etc, etc.
i could tell when we were talking that he felt like garbage for doing his part in this. i could also tell that we were pretty simular in attitude and what we like and dont like. ann keeps telling him "how different you and lorne are"

ann, him and i need to sit down and get some things straightened out. im getting 3 different storys here. and its really tickin me off.

anywho, what do u guys think?
schitz?
or something else.
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Post by Phineus »

This is getting to the point where it's really nobody's business but your own. However, I'll leave you with this thought. If it was me, I'd give them all the boot and wash my hands of every last bit of it.

>> ann, him and i need to sit down and get some things straightened out.

No you don't. It's a crock. From front to back, it's a crock. Every single one of them, they're full of it. I don't believe a single word and nobody has a shred of credibility. You're getting different stories because they're all liars.

You have to ask yourself : is this what you want to be doing for the rest of your life? Is this any kind of life for your kid?

I think not. But you can't make a new go of it as long as you continue to carry this baggage with you. Move if you have to, get a new job if you have to, but for goodness sakes it's time to give the heave ho to this bunch of self-serving, abusive, uncaring louts. No forwarding address, no contact, nothing. And jeez man, forget dating, forget bars, forget everything except you and your kid. In a year's time you'll be glad you did. You'll have a better outlook, and feel a whole lot better too. I know you for a better person than all this but you're not thinking straight. You need time, and lots of it, to distance yourself from this chaos and turmoil. Do yourself a favor and put it all as far from you as you can humanly do. You're just wasting your life, and your kid's, if you don't.
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Post by RobbyH14 »

Lorne.

I've read this all and I held you in high regard before that. Please PLEASE do what is best for the kid...leave. You, and the kid. that's it. Both of you, just get away from the rest of them. Permanently. DO NOT get back with this woman.

You will not regret your decision.
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legwon
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Post by legwon »

sorry bout bringin up the old topics yall, just thought id give a quick update here.
soon after she left i applyed to a bunch of online dating groups. hadnt gotten answer till about a week ago. a woman from russia. **HOT** woman too. :D
within the last week i mustve gotten 6-7 replys..lol
2 from russia, 2 from nigeria, 1 from surrey here,1 from britian, and one from new york. and MAN am i tellin u these ladies are nice.
1 of the nigierian ladies wants to fly over this weekend. :D [:P]
im not usre if thats such a good idea. we just started talking on monday, its now tuesday.

anywho.. thats whats goin on with me.... l8r all.
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Post by kpayne89 »

i never posted on this topic but i read through it and it seems like your gettin all the ladies now. good to here your doin good. well,........i wish the ladies would go for me. o well [uhoh]
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legwon
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Post by legwon »

updates...

got ahold of the local one... man is she hot. we have tons in common. and shes even better lookin in person.. best thing is ... she digs me too.. wooo hooo. we've been offically dating since monday.
we can talk for hrs on end and still not be tired of each other...

she has 3 kids, works, has a brain. shes not a ditz, not by a long shot. and a great personality. she actually reminds me alot of my mom.. dont know if thats a good thing or not.. lol. hope so. her kids are really great. and my daughter seems to like her too.

no we aint rushin it. were taking our time even though we cant get enough of each other... we want the kids to be comfortable if/when we do make a larger step forward. all 4 kids have been through hell and back in the last yr or so... and they dont need anymore.

as for .... whats her name again?.... o ya ann. lol... she made her bed she can lie in it.. she aint going with the kid no more... she cheated on him with a guy twice her age.. lol... shes been with him for just over 6 months now... and fram what i hear.. he is ready to kick her out... grumpy crabby ALL the time.. he just cant handle it... lol.. AND she thinks that he is cheating on her with HER MOM... lol knowing her it wouldnt surprose me none.. anns bf and her mom are only a yr or 2 apart in age... lol.


thats about it... i hope it works out with this local women. she is just awesome!!!
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Post by g8torsbizktai20 »

i have read the whole thing and im very happy for ya legawon!!!
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